I’m in a book store that has their novels separated into “Men’s Mystery” and “Women’s Mystery” what the fuck is that supposed to mean
Men’s Mystery is just about a bunch of dweebs trying to figure out what you’re wearing.
"You’re the murderer! Nice nice so are you a virgin?"
"You killed someone? Haha and then what? ;)"
If you ever think you did something embarrassing just remember that I had a really hot waiter one time and i was gonna order double pepperoni pizza but I looked him dead in the eye and accidentally asked for double penetration pizza in front of my whole family
Stop reblogging my failure